Goal Setting 101

We all have heard about goal setting.  The martial arts
belt system is based around the SMART goal principles.  
Take a larger goal and break it into smaller bite size
pieces that offer a reward system for accomplishing
milestones.  The first step into really goal setting is to...

Know what you Want - Know exactly what you want.
Be precise.  If you are unclear on a small portion,
you maybe surprised by what comes your way.
Like a sail boat on the seas without a rudder, you will
drift around life with no clear direction.

Take Action - It’s not what you know but what you do
with what you know.  Great ideas with out action,
is dreaming.  However, sometimes the action to take
is visualizing the end result.  Work Smarter not harder.

Have Daily Habits - Inch by Inch life is a cinch,
yard by yard its hard. Consistent daily steps towards
the worthwhile goal is the easiest way to get there.

Be Willing to do what is Necessary - Sometimes
we know what we have to do, but we don’t do it.  We
make excuses why it can not be done that way, or why
we can’t do it that way.

With the Attitude of Gratitude- This is one of those
areas where we can get stuck.  Negative thinking and
doubt can come easily into our mind if we are not careful.
We can think that our goals will never happen, if we
don’t have the grateful attitude towards ALL things that
come our way.  Even the struggles and challenges.
They come to make us stronger and appreciate the goal
that much more.

Enjoy the Journey - You have heard the saying Life is
not a race but a journey.  This is one universal truth.
We can only get out what we put in, so put everything
into living each day to the fullest!  Live Full, Die Empty!
Leave nothing to chance, and give everything to every
relationship you have.  What will your legacy be?

Respectfully
Mr. Rowe

Back to School (We Hope)

Hard to believe that it is already August, and in just three and a half short weeks the kids will be going back to school.  For the first time my daughter said "I am Bored" yesterday, followed by a suggestion of helping her brother weed the front by me and Boredom left her mind.

      Most parents are excited for the routine, but will miss the uncertainty that comes from the ability to go and do things with their kids whenever they want.  But the reality is kids need a routine, most kids will thrive when things are structured.  Why?  according to Dr. Luara Markham it is because kids are afraid of uncertainty.  They are cautious of new places and situation.even foods.  (Maybe just my kids)  

      But the reality is that through routine kids, and adults, gain confidence in themselves. they learn about what they can do and in small increments can be exposed to new things.  That is where martial arts fits in.  While most class structure is routine (mediation, warm-up, sport related activity, cool down/stretching)  it is the middle section of sport related activity where they can be challenged.  Our SKILLZ Program does just that!  It offers a safe environment for your kids and yourself to be encouraged and inspired to do more than they thought?

      Dr Markham goes on to state "Children, like the rest of us, handle change best if it is expected and occurs in the context of a familiar routine.   A predictable routine allows children to feel safe, and to develop a sense of mastery in handling their lives."  So why do so many parents stop routines during the summer vacation?  Well if your like my house WE, as the parents want a break from all of the rushing around.  While I agree parents do need a break, Raising Family Network states why routine is good for parents:

• They free up time for you to think about other things while you work.

• Regular and consistent routines can help you feel like you’re doing a good job as a parent.

• When things are hectic, routines can help you feel more organised, which lowers stress.

• A routine will help you complete your daily tasks efficiently.

• As children get better at following a routine by themselves, you can give fewer instructions and nag less.

• Routines free you from having to constantly resolve disputes and make decisions. If Sunday night is pizza night, no-one needs to argue about what’s for dinner.

So Lets get back to routine!  Start with getting your kids involved in the fall activities now!  Even if it is only for a couple of weeks prior to the return to school.  It will get them focused on what will be required as the begin the journey in education again.  And really won't it be better to practice before school starts rather than wait for 2 weeks into classes?  
One way that we help kids get back into routine is by offering a Kids Leadership Summit!  This is a 3 hour program that will walk kids through the steps of Goal Setting, Conflict Resolution, and Internet Safety!  Friday August 22nd 12-3 pm at Quest Martial Arts.  email chris.rowe@kelownamartialarts.com to register.  The fee for the course is a donation to the Kelowna Food Bank!

Respectfully, 

Chris Rowe

How to stay MOTIVATED

A friend of mine shared this from Facebook, and it struck home, so I had to share.  This is a young lady who is very motivated and dedicated to her craft.  She was a member of the Gold Medal winning Canadian Women’s Hockey team this year in Sochi Russia.  She is laser focused and motivated to be her best here are the tips if they work for her they can work for us.  The emphasis is mine.

Take it ONE DAY at a time - Inch by inch life is a cinch, yard by yard it’s hard.  Each day is a present to be enjoyed and lingered in.  Don't be in a rush to have it end.  Be in a rush to focus on the gift before you.

Surround yourself with POSITIVITY - You are what you continually do!  Positive people, positive books, videos, things that will help you grow and water your spirit.

CREATE a Vision Board - Our mind works better with pictures than words!  Go through your favorite websites and books cutting out images of things you wish to do, have or create!

Make S.M.A.R.T. Goals - Specific Measurable Achievable Realistic and Time Orientated.

REWARD Yourself - Every step forward is a step closer!  Breaking the Larger goal in to smaller more manageable bites is the best way to make your goals become your reality.  But just like reaching the goal, make sure you reward yourself that you might not normally do.

BELIEVE in Yourself - or rely on a friends belief in you until yours kicks in!

ACKNOWLEDGE Your positive attributes - You were born for greatness!  You have gifts and talents that yours to share with others.

RECOGNIZE your progress - towards a worth while goal!  To quote Anthony Robins "Every Day I am getting stronger and stronger, better and better, or smarter and smarter!"

VISUALIZE accomplishing your goals - See it as if it has happened, then make it happen!  I remember attending a conference with Les Brown, and Anthony Robins and Andy Nulman.  Andy Nulman used this skill and talked about how he visualized the result he wanted then reverse goal set to sell his company for millions of dollars!

BE KIND to yourself - RESPECT Yourself and others!  We are often our own worst critic, sometimes we have to remember to coach ourselves as we would coach others.  You would never come right out and tell someone you cared about that they are "So Stupid!"  Yet don't we say that to ourselves sometimes?  Okay I guess just me.

DON’T COMPARE yourself to others - Do YOUR best...your absolute best every day, and the results will come.  You are not in competition with others in life, you are here to be the best YOU can be...never look to someone else to see what they have, look inside yourself to see what you need!

Respectfully,
Mr. Chris Rowe

Quest 9 Affirmations

We seem to have lots of things we say to get ourselves ready for action.  We have talked about some before Who am I? ... I am a Champion!
 The reason we do this is because it becomes who we are, we fake it until we make it.  We convince our body that we are capable of anything by saying it over and over.  Aristotle said “We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence, then, is not an act, but a habit.”  The more we say these types of things, the more we believe in them, the more our faith and belief in ourselves grows.

Quest 9 Affirmations
1) Do it Now, Do it Right, Do it All.  We have said in the past that Procrastination is the Assassination of Motivation, Whatever you HAVE to do, do it whether you like it or not.  However, also think about the fact that your goals and dreams were given to you to share with others, if you don't share them they are lost forever.

2) Problems are Opportunities in disguise, often disguised in work clothes.  Very rarely do things “Just Happen” or are people just “Lucky”. Their good fortune is usually the result of planting many seeds, and being ready when the opportunity presents itself.

3) You are what you think you are! Information plus what you choose to focus on becomes your personal reality! (I + F = PR) The information we take in plus our own focus (positive or negative) will determine our personal reality.  If your life outside is not what you want, look at your life inside and begin to make changes there.

4) Set NO limitations for yourself.  You can have, be, or create anything you set your mind on.  What would you ask for if there were no limits and anything was possible?  Now make that happen!  We need your dreams!

5) You can only be walked on if you lay down…Your dreams and goals and vision are important.  You are important and what you have to share with others is valued.  Don't listen to the critics that will say you can't, it has never been done before!  There was a Bishop in a small town in Ohio that said if God wanted man to fly he would have given him wings!  His sons did not listen to the critic, the Wright Brothers flew!

6) You were born rich!  You are not here on earth, in one of the most beautiful cities, greatest provinces and spectacular countries in the world to be mediocre … you are here to be great.  You are abundantly wealthy in so many areas of life.  Live your life as you were meant to.  Share your wealth of knowledge, compassion, money, love, and time with all you come in contact with!

7) Settle for nothing less than what you want.  As previously mentioned you are here for greatness.  You are given ideas, goals and vision of a future that you want.  There is nothing wrong with wanting it.  Keep working towards your goals.  It will not be easy, but worth it.

8) Your body is the vehicle for your soul, treat it with respect.  If you had the most expensive car in the world wouldn't you take care of it daily?  Wash it, put only the best fuel in it, and take it in for regular maintenance? Yet you are in possession of a one of a kind vehicle whose value is unmeasurable, and we don't always treat it with the same mentality.  Watch what you put into your body physically with food, but also mentally with music, books, and media.

9) You are responsible for your happiness.  You are the only one who can make you happy or sad.  If it is to be it is up to me!  Wake up in the morning and live as if this was your last day on this great planet.  Tell the people around you how much they mean to you.  Enjoy moments with friends or the quiet.  Be Happy.  Why are you happy…Because you CHOOSE to be!
Use these 9 affirmations in statements every morning for 30 days and see the impact it will have on your life, and the life of those around you.  Some will think you have lost your mind, but the reality is you will have found it and are on the path to mastering it!  
                                                                           Respectfully,
                                                                              Mr. Chris Rowe

Facing the FEAR of Martial Arts

Many professionals who think about doing self-defense classes or taking martial arts classes don’t for many reasons.  First and foremost there is the thought that they don’t have time.  Our focus is often on our kids and their activities.  Business owners don’t think anything will happen to them, or that they could get out of the situation without having to come to physical defense.  Or maybe they are afraid to look foolish…do you know anyone that fits any of those descriptions?  Anyone you may know intimately? 

Be honest and get out of BED (Blame, Excuse, Denial) and begin to debunk the excuses you are making for yourself.

There are 168 hours in the week I ask that you take 2 hours/week to get involved in something that, from my personal experience, will change your life if you let it.  With 25-40 hours/week for sleep you still have 128 hours, or more, to get out and learn martial arts.  How much TV do you watch?  What if you got up just 30 minutes earlier each morning that would give you 3.5 hours more each week, you have lots of time.

Taking martial arts or self-defense classes will give you confidence to deal with certain situations.  If your profession is running a small business or a realtor whose job it is to meet people you have never met before in sometimes an unfamiliar place, you need to be prepared for many different situations.  The chances are small that anything will happen, but like most types of insurance you are glad you have it if you need it.

The defensive situations do not even have to involve physical defense from an unknown assailant.  The skills you learn to de-escalate a situation may help with dealing with confrontation in the work place.  It may allow you to understand how you deal with external stress and the over whelming adrenal response that happens.  When you have to deal with the overbearing personality in the office or you are trying to communicate clearly and effectively while maintaining every ones dignity, the skills taught in most martial arts schools will help you in everyday life.

For some it may have been years since you felt unsure of what you were doing in your day.  So beginning something that you have never done or becoming the student again can be energizing and scary at the same time.  I know first had that as a 4^th Degree black belt it was an amazing feeling to put on a white belt as I started to learn another style of martial art.  Step into the unknown by choice, and continue your learning, not just of an art but also of yourself.  What you are truly capable of.   

FEAR is False Expectations Appearing Real, and it is a story that our mind makes up to prevent us from reach our true potential.  Start writing a new chapter where you become a Black belt!  If you have obtained that rank in a martial art then get back in and continue the journey.  

Respectfully, 

Mr. Chris Rowe

www.kelownamartialarts.com

250-869-0111

The Higher Faculties of your mind!

Higher Faculties of the Mind 

The five senses sight, hearing, touch, smell and taste are our antennas or receptors for getting information that we perceive from our world. There are also other senses that masters’ use called higher faculties of the mind. The word “Education” comes from the Latin word “Educo” which means to educe, develop or to draw from within. An educated person is a person who has so developed the faculties of their mind that they can acquire anything they want or its equivalent without violating the rights of others they are as follow;

Perception- This gives us our point of view. It is conditioned by the way you have been taught in life and which you believe to be the truth. The incredible thing about perception is we can alter it by choice and our whole world can change for the better.

Reason- it is the power to use our conscious mind to choose what we believe. We become what we think about.

Will - willpower is the ability to hold on to one positive idea without becoming distracted by a negative thought or distraction. We use this to stay mentally focused on our goal regardless of our current circumstance or situation.

Memory- Have you ever heard or said “I have a bad memory?” I think most of us would admit having said or heard that at least once in our lives. The truth is that there are no bad memories just untrained ones. Work your memory like any other muscle. You use it or lose it.

Imagination- As little children we used this all the time until one day some well meaning adult or significant teacher in our lives told us to stop daydreaming. It seems that the older we get the more we filter incoming words and ignore the 90% or more of unspoken communication. When you put creative thought to work in your mind and become an imaginary you can create your dream life in your mind. Hold on to that thought with willpower and manifest what you want into your material life.

Intuition - Is the connection to your God, your higher self whatever you choose to call it.  It is your gut feeling, and lets you know when things are good or bad. It is your connection to other peoples vibrational state.  It is what tells you when someone walking to the room whether they are in a good or bad mood.

By using these higher faculties you can impact your results and achieve whatever you set your mind to.  What we think about we bring about, we are what we repeatedly do.  Use every once of your mental and physical ability to be the person you were designed to be.

Respectfully,
Mr. Chris Rowe

Self Defense - 101

     Self defense is a hot topic, often people will ask for one go to move.  The reality is, there is not, it depends on the situation and surroundings.  Is it self-defense from an unknown attacker or a fight that breaks out with someone you know?  When I teach self defense class we talk about three boundaries;

1) Gut Feeling - this is your own instinct that tells you when things are bad, or have that potential. It is at this stage that you need to remove yourself from the area.  Don't let your ego trick your mind in thinking that nothing bad will happen, or at least not to you.  Even if you have trained in martial arts or done a few classes, there are so many variables that can cause a situation to go bad.

2) Verbal Boundary - It is at this stage if you are really aware, and you listen to someone you may be able to de-escalate the situation and control it. If during a heated argument the other person says "Shut up or I am going to punch you in the face!"  What stands out from that comment?  For most people it "I am going to punch you in the face!"  and rightly so.  But that is just part of it.  That person has just told you what they want...for you to stop talking.  You have said something, intentionally or not that they can not process in any other way than to threaten you.

During this De-escalation phase - there are opportunities for you to be able to walk away without having to fight or defend yourself physically.  

     A) Get your ego out of the way, and accept that you said something that offended them and apologize.  

    B) Avoid threatening them.  Saying something like "Try it and I will kick your teeth in!" Is not going to allow you to walk away.

    C) Don't deny that they will carry their threat through "No you won't, you're chicken!"  Another way to start a fight.

     D) Allow them to leave with dignity  You have said everything you need to, to calm them down and instead of walking away, you say something like "I thought so!"  Yes, you had better be ready to defend yourself.

3) Physical boundary - This is the go stage, where you have tried to calm the other person down verbally and it does not work.  You have to be prepared to physically defend yourself.  This is where you need to get off the couch and practice!  There is NO class that you can do once and feel really safe.  You need to practice the skills over and over so that they become your habit.  The skills should involve gross motor skills, because under stress your fine motor skills will be less effective.  So we focus on elbows, knees, palm heal strikes and hammer fists.

If you have thought about getting involved and learning to defend yourself and your family or want information on our next class give us a call 250-869-0111!

Respectfully, 

Chris Rowe